What if the key to managing intrusive thoughts is fighting less?
Using ACT to Let Go of the OCD Battle
Living with OCD can feel like you’re caught in an endless storm of intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors. It’s exhausting. And it often makes you feel like you’re constantly at war with your own mind.
This leads to a whole lot of fight: pushing thoughts away, reviewing memories, repeating actions, or going to great lengths to try to gain a certainty that is always just a little out of reach. If there was an award for the effort exerted in trying to manage thoughts, feelings or urges, those of us with OCD would be competing for the top prize.
But, what if the key wasn’t actually in trying more or fighting harder, but rather, learning to let go?
That’s where Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) comes in—a compassionate approach that might just help you find some peace and reprieve from the seemingly never-ending fight🕊️✨
Rethinking the Struggle
OCD can make you believe that every unwanted thought that pops into your head is a battle that needs to be fought at any cost. But what I am certain of is this: the more you engage with thoughts, the stronger those thoughts become.
It’s so counterintuitive, isn’t it? We believe that if we just think about it a little more, we’ll surely arrive at an answer. If we just revisit the topic one more time, we’ll get rid of the fear, guilt, or distress. Yet these attempts bring a false sense of fleeting security at best, only until the next time the thought pops back into our heads.
ACT invites you to shift your perspective: instead of waging war against your mind, it asks you to see thoughts, images, and urges as simply an internal experience that doesn’t have to be fought.
Please don’t mistake me here: this isn’t about accepting your thoughts as truth or giving in—it’s about accepting that thoughts can exist, but that they don’t have to dictate your reality or command your life.
Acceptance of internal experiences:
Allowing yourself to experience thoughts as temporary visitors, without fighting them in any way, lessens their grip, their intensity, and their loudness in your mind. Imagine treating an intrusive thought like an undesirable guest at a party. You acknowledge they’re there, but you don’t let them ruin your present-moment experience: instead of monitoring their every move, you allow them to exist while engaging with what matters to you in the moment.
Cognitive Defusion: This is about creating a little distance between you and your thoughts. Seeing your thoughts as temporary and ever-changing, not permanent features of your reality.
Values-Based Action: At its heart, ACT is about living a life true to who you are. Instead of being bossed around by intrusive thoughts, you can call the shots in your life and engage with what matters to you, even when those thoughts are there.
Putting ACT Into Practice
1. Embracing Acceptance ✨
OCD can feel like a relentless opponent, but acceptance means acknowledging the presence of intense thoughts or urges without letting them command your emotions. Start with small steps—perhaps a few minutes of letting thoughts come into your mind without assigning meaning or attempting to solve them. With practice, a powerful shift occurs: your brain stops seeing these thoughts as urgent thoughts to get rid of or questions to answer.
2. Learning Cognitive Defusion ⬅️🧠➡️
Instead of clinging to every thought, try to adopt a sense of detachment from them. When a distressing thought pops up, insert a little separation by saying “oh, there’s the thought that…[insert intrusive thought here]”. This simple shift offers a space between you and the content and can make that content feel less urgent or demanding.
Try it with a common unwanted thought you have:
“I am having the thought that…” and notice if there is a tiny bit of distance between you and the content.
For instance, if a person struggling with intrusive thoughts about harm has the thought "What if I lose control and hurt someone?", they might instinctively react with anxiety and start mentally analyzing the thought, seeking certainty.
Using cognitive defusion, this person would practice saying:
"I am having the thought that I might lose control and hurt someone."
"I notice that my mind is telling me this thought again."
This shift helps them see the thought as just a mental event, rather than an absolute truth that requires action or resolution. Over time, this reduces the power of the thought and makes it easier to let it pass without engaging in compulsive rumination.
4. Living Your Values
The real magic of ACT is in its focus on what truly matters to you. Instead of being trapped by OCD, think about the life you want to lead. What are your passions? What gives your life meaning? When you take small, deliberate actions based on your values rather than your fears, you begin to build a life that feels fulfilling and authentic, regardless of the intrusive thoughts that come and go.
The Heart of Dropping the Fight
Letting go of the fight against OCD isn’t easy—it’s a journey, that is far from linear But embracing ACT techniques can help you experience:
Less Anxiety: By stepping back from the struggle, you find that the overall loudness and intensity of your thoughts decrease, allowing for moments of calm.
Emotional Balance: Acceptance and mindfulness can lead to a more stable emotional state: a mind that isn’t ruled by fleeting “emergencies”.
A Richer Life: When you focus on your values and what truly matters, you reclaim parts of your life that OCD might have taken over.
Inner Resilience: Over time, these practices build a sense of inner strength and flexibility, empowering you to face your life with confidence and joy.
In Conclusion…
ACT invites you to lower your shoulders, unclench your jaw, and put down the mental boxing gloves. It offers a different way of engaging with your experience, one that doesn’t demand you fight every thought, but instead invites you to exist peacefully despite them.
By shifting your focus from a relentless battle to a more mindful and values-driven life, you may find that the commanding nature of your thoughts quiet down, leaving room for healing, growth, and genuine happiness.
Remember, it’s okay to feel overwhelmed with this practice or feel as if you’re “not doing it right”. Again, this method is counterintuitive. Your current way of relating to thoughts is well-ingrained, and you might need someone to come alongside you as you learn a new method.
You’re not alone in this journey. Trust in your strength, and know that a life beyond the OCD battle is within reach.
